For the Lost Blog

Article here

A boy missing and endangered for six years after his mother fled the county with him has been found safely in Tennessee.

Madison County Sheriff’s Detective Mike Boone said Bryan Braswell was recovered Saturday by officers of the Hancock County Sheriff’s Department after an anonymous caller told dispatchers that the boy and his mother were in the town of Sneedville.

The article states that Bryan Braswell’s father had custody of all their other children, but not Bryan when his mother fled with him. I’m not sure why that was. I am at least somewhat relieved that they were not hiding in the mountains of North Carolina, as that would have been very rough living in the wilderness. I wish him and his father the best in reuniting.

During some google searches for several missing persons’ cases, I came across a web poll that asked: “Why do you think kids go missing (excluding runaways)?” A reasonable question. Two of the potential answers were “Parent wants to get back at other parent” (the one I voted for) and “Parent feels they have rights” which both address the fact most missing kids are runaways and family abductions. Over forty percent of respondents, however, answered “Abductor wants sex with child” which is one of the least common reason kids vanish. And while approximately four thousand kids are abducted by a non-family member per year, I am sure the people who answered that were thinking of the stereotypical stranger abductor and not the person well known to the child as they most often are. The media’s dramatization of stranger abductions probably has a part in it. And of course no one wants to think of abductors as being people they know, and the mysterious stranger who does so is the most comforting thought. NCMEC has tried to reframe the issue of missing kids and points out stranger abductions are rare, but that gets little attention. Some do hear of a stranger abduction and then realize the true extent of the problem. Many people who heard of the case of Sean Goldman commented they had no idea how many parents abducted kids until they heard of his case. It’s a start.

Article here

Phoenix FBI agents along with Mexican authorities have recovered a 10-year-old Phoenix boy after he was apparently missing in Mexico for more than two years, officials said.

In 2007, the boy’s father, J. Arturo Ramirez-Garcia, 37, told the boy’s mother he was taking the child to visit his grandparents for two weeks in Guanajuato, Mexico, according to a statement by the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

The father left Phoenix with the child on Aug. 8. When the two had not returned by Sept. 23, the mother called police.

The story doesn’t mention who the child is, but the last name makes it obvious that it is Thomas Ramirez-Garcia. Another article also says the police were reluctant to investigate even after his sister said (a year after he vanished) the father had abused her. If that doesn’t illustrate how family abduction is not taken seriously, I don’t know what does. I am happy Thomas is now at home safe, but like his mother I wish it was far sooner.

Aja Johnson, abducted by her stepfather after the murder of her mother, has been found deceased, along with the stepfather. Another dead child from a family abduction. (Yes, I do consider stepparents who abduct family abduction cases. I might do the same with a long term boyfriend or girlfriend, but I haven’t come across a case like that yet.)

This never gets easier. Never. And I’m not sure if I want it to.

It has been three months since Gabriel Johnson was abducted by his non-custodial mother. His father now has sole custody of him, with his mother having no parental rights at all. But all this is moot as he still has not been found. I have maintained since I first heard a news story on the case that she killed Gabriel and dumped his body somewhere. I hope I am wrong, but I have seen no evidence that indicates that. And I am typically optimistic about missing persons cases and tend to assume the person is alive without evidence otherwise.

The inital case was a typical family abduction case. I got a poster from NCMEC in a couple of days and had no reason to think it was anything more. Even now at its essentials it still is a family abduction case. His mother wanted to spite his father; the only difference is that she went further. If she hadn’t sent the text saying Gabriel was dead there would probably be almost no media coverage of the case, even if she was later found without him. If she had played the case at that point correctly, she could have even attracted supporters.

In three more months Gabriel can be on my site. Or found dead. Which is worse?

For what anyone would consider to be a group reasonably beyond reproach, the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children receives more than its fair share of criticism. What makes these critiques similar is the use of red herrings to argue it is an organization devoted to profit and that it does not help the issue of missing children. I will address some of these claims here.

The biggest argument used about the NCMEC is that most missing children recovered by them are family abductions and runaway juveniles. This is true, of course. The NCMEC has never tried to deny this and has published several things about the problems of both. Implicit in this criticism is that these are not really significant problems and the only worry is true stranger abductions, which are rare. But it is truly the media who focuses on stranger abductions and makes them seem a disproportionate issue. And both runaways and parentally abducted children are endangered; the streets pose great dangers to a homeless teenager (who are often running from serious problems at home or school) and many parentally abducted children are abused or have even died at the hands of their abductor. The second criticism mentions that they do not respond under the Freedom of Information Act. However, that is for one simple reason: NCMEC is not a government organization. You can no more get documents from them under FOIA then you could about the private company you work for. The third is that NCMEC is a for-profit organization, or has been so in the past. I am uncertain about where this came from as none of it is true – NCMEC is not and has never been a for-profit organization.

I suspect these points will never die out and will be raised forevermore. Many of them I first saw in a misleading article in Fathering Magazine, but I have seen them in news accounts and from parental abductors who wish to whitewash their crimes. While I do not work for NCMEC and never have, I do applaud their work, especially since several other missing childrens’ organizations have been forced to shut down for lack of funds. Even so, when NCMEC does the lion’s share of the work with missing children, people still do not give them much deserved credit.

Dalton Lucas and Jessica Click-Hill are both parentally abducted children that were found many years later. Both were abducted by their mothers, both at nearly identical ages (Jessica was eight and Dalton was seven), both who have fathers who were looking for them.

The biggest difference in the cases, however, is that of the outcome. By the outcome I do not mean legally, as in both cases the mothers have been arrested. The outcome in these cases I am referring to is that of the relationship with the left-behind parent. News stories about Dalton’s case say that his father drove straight from Virginia to Texas to retrieve his son, and the comments on the stories indicate that Dalton introduced his friends and others to his dad before going back with him. It will not be easy for him to readjust under any circumstances, but he seems pleased to see his dad again. Jessica, on the other hand, is indicated by news stories to have no wish to have contact with her father. She was abducted for five years more than Dalton, but since four of those years she was over eighteen it’s possible that she did not live with her mother for all of those.

So what accounts for the difference? Perhaps Dalton’s mother did not try to alienate her son from his father, although this is unlikely. Alienation is almost universal in parental kidnapping cases. Richard Warshak, an expert on parental alienation, has stated that some children are just more resilient to alienation. There are documented cases of parentally abducted children where the child later reports attempted alienation but does not succumb to its influence. Dalton’s mother could have used the classic “your father died” excuse which seems to produce less hostility towards the left-behind parent. Even that is not set in stone, of course: in the well known case of Steven Fagan he told his daughters their mother was dead and when he was arrested he admitted to the lie but then claimed she was an alcoholic. The mother had never been arrested or even accused of wrongdoing on the part of the children, but they still refused to see her or try to maintain any sort of relationship. (I mention the last to try to silence the “if the kid refuses to see a father parent they must have a good reason” crowd, but I doubt it will.) It could have something to do with the level of alienation involved – telling the child their other parent is a drug addict or alcoholic is one level, but telling them the other parent is a sadistic phyical and sexual abuser is quite another.

There’s no way to find out directly what is responsible, of course. But perhaps in both cases there is something to be learned about the detrimental effects of parental kidnapping on a child.

There has been quite a lot of articles written about the case of Isabella Miller-Jenkins. The angle the news media keeps playing up is “lesbian child custody debate.” This is literally true in that Isabella has two mothers as parents, Janet Jenkins and Lisa Miller, and that there had been a custody dispute between them. (They were married in a civil union in Vermont and separated several years later.)

However, despite the “novel and unusual” spin the media has put on it, it’s at its heart a typical family abduction case. Miller apparently engaged in a pattern of alienation against Jenkins which ultimately led to Jenkins being awarded custody of Isabella. Miller was supposed to turn her over to Jenkins on January 1, but instead fled with Isabella. There is now a local arrest warrant for her. Jenkins is just another left-behind parent. She has stated she worries about Isabella constantly and wonders if she is safe and well.

As gays and lesbians get much-needed rights in today’s society, they will marry and have families. Inevitably some will divorce, and there will be some custody battles like this one. But it’s not new, not novel, and just another part of the general problem of family abduction.

So says this article. I’m not surprised. At this point all I can hope is that they can find the body and give his father a chance to bury him. Then I can add him to my ever-growing list.

I have just heard that Manuela Antonelli, non-custodial mother of Liam McCarty, has been arrested in Italy. Liam was apparently not with her at the time.

I hope this is the beginning of the end of both the abduction and the turbulence in Liam’s life. He’s been through enough already.